Okay, we've all done it. We've all been there when we have swigged too much devilish alcohol and ended up in a sorry state of despair. Yes, some of us may have experienced this slightly more than others, but y'know it happens. It's so easy to get carried away on a night out, to keep going past your point of no return but you plow on in the hope that a doner kebab and a pint of Ribena will cure the pending hangover the next day. DO NOT ASSUME THIS. Trust me.
Now I myself have spent many a day trying to nurse my body back to health after too much rosé so know these following thoughts oh too well. Live and learn people, LIVE AND LEARN. Maybe when I turn 25 in a couple of weeks I will miraculously become some kind of sensible adult who does things like not drink?! Maybe, maybe.
Anyways, onto the thoughts:
1) WTF WHERE AM I?
2) Oh okay I’m in my bed, phew
3) Why am I still fully clothed?
4) What even happened last night?
5) I swear I only had a couple of drinks…
6) Okay maybe more, but I wasn’t that drunk…
7) Why are my eyes stuck together?
8) Am I blind?!
9) OH MY GOD I’M BLIND
10) No, I just slept in last night’s mascara and it’s glued my eyes shut
12) Okay according to social media I was a mess
13) OH THE SHAME
14) I’m so embarrassed I can’t even handle it
15) But my embarrassment is going to have to wait until I drink something
16) My throat feels as dry as Ghandis toes
17) And I need carbs in this belly ASAP
18) Someone look after meeeeeeeee
19) Oh god I’m so needy
20) Okay, water, if I down this I’ma feel a million times better
21) Glug, glug, glug
22) Noooo why am I still hungover?!
23) Okay food. What can I have that isn’t going to make me barf?
24) Is it too early for Supernoodles?
25) Probably. Fine, I’ll have some toast.
26) Oh god I don’t even have the energy to chew.
27) I need to sit down this room is spinning.
28) I’ll just check I didn’t drunk text anyone last night
29) OH GOD I DID, WHY?
30) And WHAT are these photos I took?
31) Who are these people?!
32) I can’t even deal right now.
33) Maybe a shower will snap me out of this state.
34) Literally can’t handle the standing. I’ll just have a sit down shower.
35) Ahhh that a little better!
36) Lemme put some clean jammies on.
37) Ahhhh my beds so comfy.
38) Shut eye for a little bit? Okay then.
6 hours later…
40) WHAT THE HELL
41) I’ve just wasted an entire precious weekend day.
43) Oh well. Takeaway time?!
44) FOOD GET IN MA BELLEH.
46) I love my food baby.
47) Though this has made me sleepy again.
48) I’ll put some Netflix on to keep me awake.
49) There we go, new season of Pretty Little Liars. I’m happy now.
2 minutes later…